​Because I MATTER...I told myself, as I asked the question WHY?  When I allowed myself to get creative with "bubble letters" in my journal, I simply answered a question, the question was
WHO ARE YOU CHOOSING TO BE?  My answer was clear, Being the best version of me, because I MATTER!!

That was it, I signed and dated it and I felt my body, mind and soul follow suit.

It was 9:20pm on October 23, 2016 and I knew that I hadn't been honouring myself as much as I thought I was doing all that I could to do so.  

Exactly 24 hours before this moment a dear friend of mine (Kirsten), shared a Yoga Intensive program with me, she told me it was starting on October 24th and it was something that would be 5 days per week going from 6am until 7:30 am for an entire month.  I got excited with the thought of it, but quickly found myself making all the excuses for why it wouldn't work.  Yet for the entire 24 hours, I continued to think about how great it would be if I would commit to myself and make some positive changes, starting with waking up early to take time for me before anyone else in the house was awake.  

When the negative self talk came in (which I refer to now as the lizard brain, thanks to a great mentor, Colin James), I knew that this wasn't me...this was my past dictating my future and I was listening to my self talk as some sort of boss in my life.  And then I remembered that the power is within myself to either believe the negative self talk or to acknowledge it and move beyond it.

​​That lizard brain got louder and LOUDER.  It was saying things such as, "are you crazy? You can't get up before 7:00, you can barely wake up before 7:30, so who are you kidding?  This will be just ONE more thing you will start and not complete and it will be a waste of your money.  You may start strong, but there is NO way you will create a new habit"  And the messages continued.



48 hours earlier I had also made a commitment to myself, to get back into healthy eating habits through the program I cherish and represent in my business.  The past few months have been less than ideal.  I wasn't a product of my product for quite sometime, I would find myself doing great for a bit and then falling back into bad habits.  I was rushing most mornings to get the kids fed and out the door, and half the time they were missing the bus so I was driving them to school.  Instead of having a shake, I would find myself driving through the Tim Horton's drive thru to have a breakfast sandwich approximately twice a week.  There were many days that I would go to Barrie to do errands or meet up with others, only to find that I didn't plan well, and would get hungry while in the city...so I would often pull through a drive through to have a 6 inch sub or a wrap (trying to convince myself that this is a "healthy-ish" choice), only to find myself lacking in energy and motivation throughout the day.

So once again, because of my previous commitment to myself to return to my healthy eating habits and now adding a "get up out of bed" and yoga expectation 5 days a week, I was finding myself hearing that lizard brain saying, "yup, you really are crazy...you think you can return to a healthy eating habit by doing a 9 day cellular body cleanse and finish it continuing as a 30 day system AND wake up early and do yoga...yes, you Tara Cooper have lost your mind...and I call the BS card on you...you will NOT do it, because you have tried so many times before, and you have NOT EVER continued...but go ahead, go against what I say, and I will PROVE that you can't follow through."

Yes that lizard is a bother, it is downright rude if you ask me...but I knew (because of so much work I've been doing on my mindset) that this is normal and this lizard brain of mine is trying it's best to keep me safe in my bubble of comfort.  My lizard LOVED to sleep in and eat junk.

So as I prepared to move forward with a BEGINNER'S MINDSET, (in order to build myself some new and sustainable healthy habits), I thanked my lizard brain (picture of the lizard drawn by Colin James) for trying to keep me safe and I made a conscious decision to plan for the next day. October 24th would be my first day of new beginnings.

• I will wake up at 6:25am to Adventure of a Lifetime by Coldplay
• I will take my peppermint and orange essential oils and put them in my diffuser
• I will do 20 minutes of yoga: Easy Yoga for Beginners - Full Body Gentle Flow Yoga (youTube)
• I will do 20 minutes of meditation with Either: Chakra Cleansing & Activating guided meditation on YouTube OR Buddhist Meditation for Beginners  (I did end up choosing the Chakra Cleansing today)
• I will do 20 minutes of journalling or soul journalling (I love soul journaling, goes so much deeper and beneficial for me)
• I will have my Ionix, my shake and my vitamins when I finish
• I will make breakfast and lunches for the kids

Did I do what I set out to do?
Well that lovely LIZARD brain of mine tells me, "don't get too excited, because you have started strong in the past, only to fizzle out within a few days".  However, my soul is cheering me on, saying YES, you did it, you proved that it is possible to rise early before anyone else, and even before your alarm went off.  You were able to get everything done that you set out to do and you ROCKED it Tara.

So yes, I did what I set out to do and I do feel wonderful.  I enjoyed the Yoga and the Chakra Cleansing (links found above) and had 15 minutes to journal, which was NO PROBLEM to complete, I wrote the entire 15 minutes.  I started with 2 paragraphs of personal journalling and then completed approximately 3.5 pages of Soul Journalling (see link for more on how to do soul journaling if you are interested). Or for a more detailed exercise, buy Elisa Romeo's book called Meet your Soul.

I began the day as I planned to and I loved every single moment of it.  I got my Ionix and my shake with vitamins before anyone came downstairs for breakfast. I managed to make lunches and breakfast for the kids and we enjoyed a continuous replay of our song of the day: Coldplay's Adventure of a Lifetime.  The kids had a bounce in their step and so did my husband and I.  They got on the bus.  And our day was off to a great start.

The morning was light, fresh and inspiring.  I look so forward to beginning my day the same way tomorrow.
Nutrition as planned for anyone interested in doing this too (if you don't know what certain things are, and have interest, just ask.), include consumption of water throughout the day also.
Morning:

• Ionix (1 oz) 
• Isa-shake mixed only with water
• Accelerator x 1, Brain boost x 3, Product B x 2
• Greens (1 shot)
• snack midmorning (likely IsaDelight)
• e+ shot

Afternoon:

• Ionix (1 oz)
• Isa-shake mixed only with water
• snack (Chewables or IsaDelight - or veggies with hummus)

Evening:

• fish (baked) - will share recipe soon (I tend to put it together as I make it)
• rice or quinoa mixture
• veggies and or greens (1 shot if needed)

Before Bed:

• sleep spray (2 sprays)
• IsaComfort x 2
• IsaOmega (1 or 2)
• Thyroid medication (as prescribed)

*I am not currently taking any other supplements or vitamins at this time, but will increase or alter times as I bring habits back into my routines.


I choose music today to be about Intuition and Connection...and a bit of Physical!  This is a great chart to help with music choices for your Chakras.

Something I've learned recently is the fact that for so long I've created a life that I am "needed" by others.  I have created a reality that by being available so often (without boundaries) that I've had no respect for myself, almost as if I am not worthy of having it.  My entire life I've been someone who feels guilty if I don't plan a get together, guilty if I don't make the effort to see others I haven't seen in so long and by doing this, I've stretched myself to become overwhelmed and resentful - when I felt so busy (overbooking) or when I didn't feel I was getting the same "love" back.  So it was as if somewhere in my mind, by doing it more would somehow make me feel better. WRONG!

When I was teaching I would give my lesson plans freely to teachers, only to find a few would abuse it and put their name on it because they changed a page in the entire unit. Again, I was feeling manipulated and used.

Fast forward to a few years ago when I began to be a business owner. Did it again.  Give, give, give to a point where eventually some started to abuse my generosity.  Manipulation began to take place and I once again was feeling used.  

Even as I write this, it is still happening to me.  But today I see the TRUTH!  Today I know that it is 100% my responsibility to change this pattern, this habit, this IDENTITY.

Have you ever been someone who did someone a favour once thinking that would be the only time you would do that, only to catch yourself doing it again, and again and again?  Now - I do recognize that there is a difference between being kind and giving (your time, money, effort to someone because that is what we do as humans, we help one another) and giving to the point of becoming manipulated or used.

My post today is not an attempt to say, stop giving to others.  It is entirely the opposite - keep giving to people without expectation - yes I said that, without expectation. However if you notice the signs that your giving becomes EXPECTED by certain people or groups, may it is time to rethink who you are giving to and how you are giving. Because if your giving becomes a habit that others expect more and you now feel obligation to give your time, money or support than it might be possible that YOU have created this pattern and only YOU can change it.

In my business it is simple for me to give so much that I enable people rather than empower them.  I may do something for them (that they are responsible to learn to do for themselves-with my support if they choose) but because they give me a great story about why they can't learn right now, I have been the one to go ahead and do it for them to help out and "get it done".  This is where I've recognized the identity I've mastered...and one that I know I am responsible to change. If I keep doing for others, without teaching the skills so they can do it for themselves, I am the only one making the biggest mistake, because what I am really teaching in this situation is that "if you don't have time to learn it, I will do it for you".  YIKES, what have I created?  A sure fire way to crash and burn. No one, not one person can keep doing for others without teaching them to do it for themselves, we cannot physically keep up to this expectation - but ironically if this happens, we are responsible, we created this habit.

I'll admit that even today it is happening and I declare that this will be the LAST time.  I said it, the LAST time I will do something without teaching it.  Or will it be the last time?  Habits are hard to break, especially when they become who you are - your identity.  Yet I am smart enough to know that I've created this and I am the only one who can un-create it. The only fool is the one who fails to change the habit.

What is happening in your life because you've made it your identity?  What are you ready to break or un-learn so that you can learn how to live a more empowered and fulfilled life? Are you doing things for others and realizing that you are now becoming manipulated to do more of what you offered to do before? Is it now expected of you? Or have you somehow become addicted to the feeling you get because when you do what others may be expecting, you feel validated, worthy, and finally as if you are enough in this world - even just for that moment?

What if, just what if - today you declare to yourself that you are willing to STOP?  That you respect yourself enough to stop doing what you've always done - to please others, to feel adequate.

Something else I have recognized that I've been doing - which has become an addiction is that I can easily live in drama and I can complain about anything.  YET - what is that doing?  It is somehow telling me that to feel alive, something must be wrong.  To feel worthy, I want to feel validated in knowing that others have heard my drama and conflict.  Don't we all become guilty of playing this role at times in our life?  

Here is what Rod Hariston says in his book, Are you up for the Challenge, when talking about the role of the Victim.

Someone is always taking advantage of the Victim. Somehow, he always ends up on the short end of the stick.  He expects people to abuse him, or lie to him, or hurt him.  If he would look objectively at his life, he would realize that this happens over and over and over again.  Sometimes a Victim will think, "maybe that's just my fate; I was born to be a victim." Many times he doesn't even realize that he has a choice in what happens to him.

The Victim sees himself perpetually at the mercy of people, circumstance and situations around him. The majority of his focus is on himself and how he is affected by the outside events, and his mood is controlled by what is happening in his world at that moment.  To him, the world is a place where negative experiences are to be expected and people are not to be trusted.


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