I had the absolute honour and privilege of having 30 minutes on the phone with a beautiful soul a few weeks ago. I have followed her and I have been positively influenced by her for years now. She is 27 years old and is a woman who believes in being completely authentic while contributing to the world in so many ways. She speaks a lot about really showing others how great life is meant to be. When she speaks, she speaks truth, never BS, always exactly as she thinks it and feels it. Her name is Peta Kelly. She is a true light to the world. As she demonstrates, life is about living - so why do the majority of us HOLD BACK?
Interesting that as we continue to do things, we believe they are moving us forward towards our best life, our dreams and our aspirations. Yet, so often we are holding ourselves back, simply because we are SO damn afraid of the light we have within us...we are terrified to share that light with anyone else, why? Many fear ridicule, judgement, and some may even feel like it is somehow "attention seeking". When done from love and not ego, this is so far from the truth. Our Ego tries to keep us "safe" (thank you Ego), our Ego also creates these stories of, "if I do that, say that, share that, I will be judged, so better stay quiet over here in my corner of the world". Our Soul on the other hand wants so desperately for us to move and grow and share our light with the world.
Something I've learned with the help of the many lessons I've gained from this woman (and many other light filled Souls on our Planet) is that our light is often dimmed and some of us have even lost the light inside completely. We have listened to others criticize, we have experienced personal rejection, we have let others affect us so much that we turn our own light off to "fit in" with the rest who have also lost their light. Can you believe that we also do this to ourselves? Why would we ever want to do this?
At an event I was at in Vancouver last week, we finished the 4 day event with a beautiful session where we all had a candle in our hand. David TS Wood (one of the event trainers and organizers), explained the whole idea of our "light" and how so many of us don't even know that we have one...but we ALL do. When the lights were completely out, he slowly lit a few candles in the room. He then asked those of us with a lit candle to slowly move around the room to light the other candles, but we had to look the person in the eye and smile at them - as a way to pass this beautiful light to the others - like giving a gift of beautiful and authentic intention to others (a light, a smile and eye contact). It was a very moving moment (surprise, surprise - I cried a lot during this segment) He explained this as a way to demonstrate how it works when we treat others with kindness, when we pour belief into others and when we have compassion and love for others (as well as for ourself). Before long, all of us (approx 600 people) had our candles lit. We walked into the circle and created a bond of light. At one point he asked us all to blow our lights out - as this is what happens when we feel alone, we feel like we are not enough, when we feel unworthy etc...
A turning point:
There were a few children in the crowd. Two little girls in particular didn't blow out their candles as asked. They just didn't want to do it. (funny how this happens as it clearly wasn't planned). The girls whined when David asked them again, to please blow out their candles. If I am not mistaken, it took David to blow them out for them as they just wouldn't blow out their own lights. He expressed that this example is so very realistic. That our children do not want to blow out their own light, they continue to shine even when so many are slowly dimming their lights. Adults don't intend to do this to our children, but it is everywhere. Sadly as adults dim a child's light, they slowly show children how to dim other children's lights. In my opinion this could be why we have such trouble with bullying in our schools. Teasing, poking fun, hurting feelings etc...starts somewhere and a child doesn't just "get this way". We are trying so hard to have our children follow rules (safety rules are important for sure), some rules are about conforming and what we may not realize, is that we are dimming their lights, we are trying to make them become someone they are not (I know I've been guilty of this myself as a parent and maybe even when I was teaching). I had a moment of tears as I realized this truth. Are we empowering our children or are we tearing them down? This also could be asked with the word adults in place of children. It is happening to us all no matter how old we are. Most of us reading this have been contributing to dimming of lights. Sorry - but that is truth. We may not mean to, but we are. Time to change that.
Where in your life right now are you either dimming the lights of others or of yourself? Have you ever recognized this before? Have you complained, pointed fingers, insulted, ridiculed, judged yourself or another person to the point that the light they had inside eventually lost the beautiful glow, the amazing shine? I know I've witnessed people who have lost their light - sometimes their own husband or wife has belittled them so much that they no longer have a voice. Sometimes it is our children who lose their own voice when they begin to go to school. It might be you reading this today..maybe somewhere in your life YOU have lost your voice, your truth, your light.
Today is a NEW DAY! I am determined to help others reinvent themselves - reinvent their light that they may have lost because of fear or because they felt forced to conform. The world deserves to have your light shine - again (even if you lost it as a child yourself).
Personally I know that I allowed my light to dim when I was very young. Education, expectations from others and even expectations from myself all contributed to this. After I talked with Peta Kelly a few weeks ago, I knew that this was a turning point for me and SO MANY others. I believe with awareness and with a decision, we can all find our light to share with the world again. I look at my own children and I see their light is still shining, even though somedays it appears dimmer....let's ignite others by first igniting ourselves first. WE MUST reinvent ourselves...and the time is now. And like all candles, we sometimes require a new spark to ignite us again. This is possible, but it must begin with the things we allow to go into our mind, the people we hang around, the influences we allow to affect or infect us.
How will you begin to treat yourself and others - starting today? My guess is you have been YOUR biggest critic. Something I've also learned by another great mentor, PK Smith, when we have Approval, Consideration and Patience of ourself first, we learn how to be that way with all others we meet. But it must start with us. We are an example to others and if we treat ourselves poorly, if we don't respect ourselves, how on earth do we ever show others how to do it? Ultimately, if we want to live a great life, we must start with how we treat ourselves - or no one will ever believe what we say. If I speak about loving to have choices and loving that we are helping others create time freedom, but I am constantly sick and tired and stressed out...that is a BIG sign that I am not living what I am speaking. I can say this, because it is how I got myself into a mess last fall with my own health. I was not in alignment - and guess what, my faint light was dimmed so much it went very dark.
Together we really can change the world. There is so much suffering and yet from where I write (in Canada) we have so much to be grateful for. Yet so many of us live in self-loathing - if we can turn that into self-love, we will help others see how incredible it really can be.
Are you ready to turn your own light back on so that you can help others turn theirs on too? It may have been decades since you felt that spark, but it is NEVER too late. Commit to making this happen today. Make today the day you decide to REINVENT yourself.