With the recent news of celebrities taking their own lives this week, I was seeing a lot of judgement on social media, as if others know what they might have been going through when they made the final decision to do what they did.
When so many of us question why people are taking their own lives when we see them as successful...maybe it’s time we stop putting people on a pedestal and remember we are ALL human and we ALL have struggles to overcome. Perhaps (not saying this is true) those in the spotlight, have an even harder time being heard for their challenges...because we all know how it goes...many just don’t believe or care when someone says “I’m struggling”.
I’ll be transparent for a moment...when I was going through my own downward spiral, most people who knew me as bubbly and happy go lucky, began to turn a blind eye because as I was completely public about it all through my blog (as my own healing)...people didn’t like it. I was criticized by some of my closest friends to stop being public about it...but why? To make it easier on them to not have to see that I was struggling? I’m still carrying resentment about some who began treating me differently back then...as if they somehow lost respect for me for being so raw and real.
Maybe if we were more open about it, we would heal faster, I know that I feel that it helped me heal and I know that my transparency helped others who were feeling isolated and alone as they struggled in silence.
So turning a blind eye seems easiest, but all it does is makes it intensify the s&*@ people go through when they are down.
These moments can take weeks, months, years, decades to heal from. Sadly I still hear things such as, “they should snap out of it already” or “is it all for show, for attention?” These comments make me want to vomit. How inconsiderate of people to judge others when they are struggling...and if we are fortunate to know when someone is struggling...it’s because the person is asking for support and help...they don’t want to be another statistic that fell into suicide. Suicide has such a negative reaction....”how selfish of them to leave a child” etc...when if we all stopped to really imagine how bad it must have been for them...a person in the right frame of mind would not ever leave their loved ones behind and take their own life -NEVER! So instead of thinking how selfish they are, let’s help those struggling feel supported. Peer support often gets lost and then people are expected to seek medical attention or professional support...but if we could all just hold space for those suffering and respect them as HUMAN beings who are suffering...I believe we’d see less suicide!
The stigma around mental illness and personal struggles is sick...and it is up to ALL of us to make a change!
Reach out to someone NOW who you personally know is struggling. Your kindness may just be the gift they needed today, in this VERY MOMENT!
Obviously there are all different severities...but it doesn’t make one person any less important. Depression, anxiety, PTSD, bipolar and other mental health challenges are nothing to ignore. Let’s all be part of the solution, instead of adding to the devastating reality we’ve all created!
Something to consider as we move forward each day. You know who the "strong" people are, those who say they are always doing fine, but deep down they are not, but they don’t want to burden anyone or admit they are not ok, ego and pride often try to protect people.
I’ve felt it at times with friends who are doing the “strong” thing and when I dig deeper I find out they really needed to talk about more than surface stuff.
How often do we actually take the time to dig deeper, to listen at a level that allows depth?